Press "Enter" to skip to content

10 Things Never To Say To A DJ

It doesn’t matter how drunk you are, there’s no excuse to say ANY of these things.

1. “So, are you a guy or a piano or what?”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>

2. “I like the ice cream truck’s version better.”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>

3. “Would you rub those magic fingers of yours on my ailing daughter?”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>

4. “You can take the night off; I have a couple of songs stuck in my head.”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>

5. “Please, I need to hear a C-sharp or I will die.”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>

6. “I don’t know what it’s called, but could you play that song that goes, ‘Whoa Black Betty, bam-ba-lam / Yeah Black Betty, bam-ba-lam / Black Betty had a child, bam-ba-lam / Damn thing gone wild, bam-ba-lam / She’s always ready, bam-ba-lam / She’s all rock-steady, bam-ba-lam / Whoa Black Betty, bam-ba-lam / Yeah Black Betty, bam-ba-lam / All right / Yeah / Oh yeah, oh right / Oh yeah, oh right / Oh yeah, oh right / Oh yeah, oh right / Hey-eh-eh-eh’?”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>

7. “There are many songs online ripe for the taking!”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>

8. “My dad says that DJs are human pieces of furniture, like sweaty, breathing radios, and that you don’t need to save them during fires.”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>

9. “Can you do the thing where you take two records and put them over your eyes to make it look like you have big eyes?”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>

10. “Can everyone else hear you too?”

. at 0x7f072e5fb4d0>