If you’re a homeowner, nothing is more unsettling than a bug infestation. But the anxieties of having thousands of creepy crawlies living in your walls can be exacerbated by having an exterminator who appears to be sympathetic to your pests. Here are six signs the exterminator you hired is on the bugs’ side.
1. The bugs painted on the side of their truck aren’t crossed out or anything and appear really happy
Generally, the type of exterminator who wants to kill bugs will have a truck that expresses their hatred for bugs through graphics of dead bugs flipped over on their backs or a big red “prohibited” circle with a bug in it. If the truck that pulls up to your place has a motif on the side that seems to be celebrating bugs, like an image where a group of bugs are enjoying cocktails on the beach or a family of bugs is celebrating Christmas, you might want to call a different company.
2. They start crying when you explain to them that you want the bugs killed
An exterminator’s emotional response when you start describing what you want done to the bugs that are destroying the foundation of your house can be telling. If they nod and say, “Yep, that’s what we do. We kill ‘em,” then you’ve probably found someone who is going to be on your side in your battle against insects. But if they become noticeably emotional at the first mention of spraying insecticide on the bugs, and start weeping or feeling faint, you may be dealing with a bug-lover who wants to see the bugs win.
3. They ask if they can have the bugs
If your exterminator shows up with a bunch of little bug houses and ant farms and asks if they can take or even buy the bugs from you, odds are this person might not be on your side when it comes to your conflict against your home’s invaders. Sure, at least they’re offering to move the bugs out of your home, but who knows what they’re planning to do with them next. It’s entirely possible the exterminator could give the bugs some sort of special training and then bring them back to take over your house in an even more dominant fashion than before.
4. Instead of spraying the bugs with poison, they spray them with a mixture of sugar water and bug eggs
Keep a close eye on what’s in the spray bottles your exterminator uses when they’re spraying your bugs. It should be something that’s bad for bugs, like hydramethylnon, and not something that bugs love, like sugar or bug eggs. And you definitely want to make sure they aren’t just spraying more live bugs into the walls. That’s not gonna help your problem at all.
5. They appear to know the bugs’ names
If you hear your exterminator whispering to the bugs and it’s apparent that they know all of the bugs’ names (or even just the leaders’ names), that should give you pause. Keep an eye out for your exterminator cupping their hands to the wall and gently calling out, “Hello, Marty! Hello, Clyve! Hello, Beatrice!” every time they arrive at your home. If they’re doing that, they might be a little too chummy with your bugs to want to really nuke the shit out of those guys.
6. They kind of look like a bug.
This one should make it pretty obvious that your exterminator is on the bugs’ side. If the exterminator has antennae or lots of eyes or even just vaguely resembles a cricket, it’s clear this person chose the wrong profession. It’s totally unprofessional for an exterminator to be part bug or bug-adjacent, because their sympathies are going to lie with the bugs and not your house’s structural integrity. You definitely don’t want to put this person in charge of your bug problem.
