6 Tips For Breaking Away From Routine And Living A Totally Spontaneous Life
July 6, 2015
Redd’s Apple Ale
None
It’s time to face facts: You’re boring. You need to learn how to break away from the everyday monotony that rules your life—and fast. Well, we have you covered.
1. It’s the same every day—wake up, go to work, go home, go to sleep—so mix it up by evolving into the first-ever human being to not require sleep to sustain life. So easy!
2. Gentlemen, don’t just shave every day—shave all day! Lather your face with shaving cream in the morning and sporadically shave a strip off your face as you go about your daily routine. Why are your coworkers giving you and your shaving cream–covered face a weird look? Because they’re thinking, “Wow, this guy knows how to spice things up!”
3. Most adults have 32 teeth. That means there are millions upon millions of possible orders for brushing your teeth. Make every brushing special by recording the exact order you brushed each tooth so that you never repeat the same sequence. Routine=broken.
4. Showing up for work like clockwork at 9:00 a.m. every day is so vanilla. Add a little zest to your life by showing up at 9:02 a.m. twice a week. Goodbye, Mr. Predictable!
5. We bet you drink coffee and shower every morning. Why not combine the two by showering in scalding hot coffee? Save time, get energized, and, most importantly, avoid the mundane.
6. Tired of eating the same thing for lunch every day? Add a new daily ingredient! Day one could be turkey and Swiss on rye. Day two might be turkey, Swiss, and lettuce on rye. In a couple of weeks, you could be eating turkey, Swiss, lettuce, tomato, onion, chitlins, black pudding, baklava, pad see ew, laundry detergent, the vinyl recording of Pet Sounds, an actual Swiss person, Barney Frank’s glasses, and Saint Vincent and the Grenadines on rye.
We use cookies to optimize our website and our service.
Functional cookies
Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes.The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
We use cookies to optimize our website and our service.
Functional cookies
Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes.The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.