Anyone who’s ever gone dress shopping with her best friend understands these things.
1. You have to be ready to sub in for the bride at any time: Weddings are long and can take a toll on the bride. As maid of honor, you have to be ready to assume her role if she ever needs to take a breather.
2. Something terrible must have happened to her sister: Whoa. Her sister is only a bridesmaid and she’s not RSVPing to any of your Evites.
3. It’s so annoying when people ask you when you’re going to die: People just assume that because you’re a maid of honor, you’re probably going to die soon. “When are you going to die?” “Do you have any plans to die soon?” “You’re next!” Seriously, people, chill.
4. You can hear smells: One cool perk for the maid of honor is their vastly enhanced sense of hearing. At dawn on the day of the wedding, a typical maid of honor is able to hear the smell of a squid that is 20 miles beneath the surface of the Pacific Ocean.
5. It’s your job to drink the soda cans that they use for the “Just Married” car decorations: Tradition says that the maid of honor must consume the soda from the cans that are tied to the car bumper for the “Just Married” decorations. For this reason, the kind of soda used is left to the maid of honor’s discretion.
6. Brett Ratner directed all three Rush Hour movies: If there’s one thing a maid of honor understands, it’s that Brett Ratner directed not one, not two, but all three of the martial arts action/comedy movies in the Jackie Chan–Chris Tucker franchise.
7. You don’t have to take the groom’s last name: It’s 2015, plain and simple. It’s not uncommon to keep your own last name, or even hyphenate it with his for a happy medium!
8. You’ve worked your way up the ranks from flower girl: Don’t give up. With each successive wedding, you get closer and closer to being the bride, and soon, all your dedication will pay off.
