They say that when God closes a door, He opens a window, and here’s an amazing story that shows how when things in life don’t go as planned, sometimes a much greater opportunity comes along instead: These high school boys thought they drilled a hole into the girls’ locker room but actually got to see the inside of the gym teacher’s weird little office.
Lucky! That’s even cooler than what they were hoping for!
While the group of popular boys who drilled the peephole arrived at Mr. Mangum’s fourth period P.E. class eager to see scantily clad locker room babes today, their horniness quickly gave way to pure, childlike wonder when they peered through their misplaced handiwork and laid eyes on the strange, forbidden quarters of their teacher’s private office. Adorned with broken gym equipment, empty Wendy’s cups, photos of a homely woman presumed to be his wife, a little thing of Flonase, various school spirit artifacts, and countless other treasures, the office provided a mesmerizing glimpse into the pitiful personal life of the weird middle-aged man who had devoted his career to blowing a whistle and forcing adolescents to run the mile against their will—a sight far more enthralling than the nubile bodies of the teens’ female peers.
“Holy shit, he’s got two huge jugs of creatine powder on his desk!” one of the boys marveled, prompting his fellow teen voyeurs to snicker giddily at the idea of their old, balding teacher attempting to get swole. “And—oh my God—is that a cot? Bro, he’s got a cot in there! What the fuck, does he live in his office? Dude’s a troll!”
“Damn, there are, like, four huge filing cabinets in there,” he added with a level of excitement that not even spying on naked girls could elicit. “Why the hell would he need those, it’s not like he has papers. And, bro, look at that bookshelf! There are literally only three books, and they’re all about leadership. He thinks he’s a leader!”
One by one, the boys jockeyed for a turn at the peephole, going absolutely apeshit each time they spotted a hilarious new item of their teacher’s, such as the cheap battery-powered lumbar massager strapped to his stain-covered computer chair, the pile of ripped dodgeballs with stuffing coming out the side, and the random-ass desk—like, the kind students use—that he apparently dragged over from a classroom for some reason. While seeing some of the hottest girls in their grade stripping down to their bras and panties would’ve undoubtedly been rad, it couldn’t hold a candle to the experience of looking at all the goofy, sad shit strewn about their gym teacher’s most private sanctum, which felt almost like staring directly into his weird-ass soul.
“Dude, check it out, he has his own mini coffee pot in there, like the kind college kids have in their dorms,” laughed another boy, adding that he probably doesn’t like going to the teachers’ lounge for coffee because he’s not friends with any of the other teachers. “Ooo, and check it out, there’s a tie on a clothes hanger. Probably keeps it in there the entire year just to wear to the sports awards—not like he’s got actual formal events to go to.”
“You know he only makes $38,000 a year? It’s public info, you can look it up online,” he continued, noting that the whole reason Mr. Mangum directs traffic in front of the school in the mornings is because he needs the extra money to support his family. “That’s also probably why all his stuff is so shitty. He can’t afford to have a good office.”
By this point, the boys had realized that the wall leading to the girls’ locker room was only, like, 10 feet away on the other side of the room, but it seemed they were no longer interested in the slightest, as they were far too invested in the drab, cluttered office before them, which they speculated probably never gets cleaned because it’s not important enough for the janitor’s time. Eventually, they were forced to leave their peephole and go to class, but not before becoming utterly captivated by the motivational poster hanging on their teacher’s wall—that classic school poster of the iceberg where only the tip is sticking out—which they realized he intentionally chose as the sole piece of decor for the wall over his desk, probably meaning that he actually finds it inspiring.
A 46-year-old who feels genuinely motivated by a picture of an iceberg—God, it’s just too rich! These boys are lucky dogs for getting the chance to peek into this devastatingly lame office!
There’s no doubt that all of these guys will remember this day for the rest of their lives. Though they’ll have plenty of chances to see naked girls when they get older, getting to gawk at their gym teacher’s pathetic private quarters is truly a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and one that they’ll never regret taking.
