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5 Awesome Backyard Experiments To Teach Your Child That Owls Are Indestructible

Sometimes the best lessons happen outside of the classroom, and hands-on science can help spark a kid’s lifelong love of learning, not to mention provide hours of fun! Here are five awesome backyard experiments to teach your child that owls are indestructible.

1. Owl Drop Challenge: Set up a step ladder next to an owl and challenge your kid to put even a single dent in the bird by furiously raining stones upon it from height (smaller kiddos may need help hoisting stones over 10 pounds). Watch your child’s amazement as lumps of thick granite cleave in two against the softly hooting owl’s adamantine skull, failing to put even one feather on the owl’s head out of place. Every rock they gleefully drop will teach them more about owls’ indestructibility than any textbook ever could! If you like, join in on the fun yourself by power-dunking the heaviest stone you can find over the owl like a basketball to show that even full-grown adults are powerless to harm an owl. Just be VERY CAREFUL that no one strikes the owl directly, as any human limb would break like a twig against its unyielding form.

2Owlcano: Lean several thick logs over an owl in a firepit and generously douse the resulting teepee structure in gasoline. From a safe distance, toss a lit piece of kindling to ignite a dramatic fireball, and observe with your child as flames bathe—but do not consume!—the owl. Throw on more logs as the fire reduces them to ash, being sure to leave gaps through which your kid can watch the owl lazily rotate its head without a care in the world. Once you’re done enjoying the fire (and maybe roasting a few marshmallows while you’re at it!), remove the owl with a pair of tongs, and after shaking off any stray coals, place it directly into your child’s hands. They’ll find that despite coming straight from a fire, the owl is cool to the touch. Explain to them that someday, billions of years from now, the sun will expand to engulf the earth, and when it does, owls will swim through its flames like fish. “They’ll be all that’s left of this,” you can tell them as you gesture broadly, and their faces will light right up. Kids love learning about the indestructibility of these marvelous birds!

3. Lightning Owl: Affix an owl to the top of a 100 foot metal pole and set it outside during a thunderstorm. From the safety of your home, watch through a window as the lightning that knocks whole limbs off of mighty oaks passes harmlessly through the owl, serving only to lend the bird’s hooting an amplified, crackling quality. Explain to your child that for as long as humans have had gods, lightning bolts have been regarded as instruments of their divine fury. Then point to the owl, shrugging off bolt after bolt as it impassively scans your yard for voles. Ask your child what this tells them about gods. Ask your child what this tells them about owls.

4: Russian Nesting Owl: Help your child place an owl inside a goose inside a turkey inside a pig, and CAREFULLY lower the animals into a large tub (non-reactive, please!) of acid. If you’re having trouble getting the owl to fit, opt for a smaller but no less indestructible variety such as a screech or a saw-whet. Check in on the tub periodically as the acid slowly eats its way through the outer carcasses, remarking “Acid beats pig,” or “Acid beats turkey,” as the situation demands. Finally, once the last of the goose has dissolved away, fish out the owl and set it far away from your child to shake any remaining acid and liquified flesh from its feathers. “Owl beats acid!” they’ll cheer in delight, and you can cheer back, “Owl beats EVERYTHING!” because that’s demonstrably true.

5: Owl-Style Bullet Catch: (WARNING: Eye and ear protection for kids AND adults is a must!) Using bricks and a tripod, set up a hunting rifle on a table so it aims straight ahead at a tree in your yard. Place an owl snug against the muzzle, and kneeling on the ground, position your own head directly behind the owl. Once you’re good to go, have your child pull the trigger. Most kids will require a little coaxing to fire a gun pointed at their parent, but shouting things like “DO IT!” or “SIMPLE CHILD, THIS OWL COULD WITHSTAND A NUCLEAR BOMB!” should do the trick. Don’t worry if your kid cries—remember, these experiments are for fun, but the deepest insights into strigine indestructibility are not won without confronting the terrible frailty of our own human flesh. It’ll all be worth it when they finally take the shot, tentatively call out to you, and gasp as you slowly lean out from behind the owl completely unscathed. Deafening ringing will fill the air, a pure and somehow liquid sound. Carefully pull the rifle away to show your child the bullet spinning in place against the owl’s feathers, suspended mid-flight by the strange and ancient power of these beautiful creatures. Let your child revel in the bullet’s otherworldly dance for a moment. Then, quickly pull the owl out of the way and watch the bullet continue along its path into the tree. The hole it leaves will serve as a powerful reminder of these lessons for years to come! Once you and your budding scientist are done experimenting, simply spiral the owl back into the woods like a football. As you must surely understand by now, this does not hurt the owl!