Today is National Jerky Day, and while you know better than to let this day go by without celebration, there are many more unexplored holidays deserving of a circle on your calendar. Don’t let these special days fly under the radar again:
1. Easter, Jr.
All the joy and pageantry of Easter, but geared towards kids! Parades! Candy! Toys! Scavenger Hunts! All your favorite parts of Easter, now made more kid-friendly!
2. Crab Person’s Day
On the first Monday in August every year, people are asked to show a little appreciation to the monstrous crab/human hybrids in their lives with gifts of materials that can be used as shells and salves to soothe the constant, horrible pain that is their existence.
3. Take Your Kids’ Least Impressive Friend To Work Day
One day before taking your own kids to work, lower everyone’s expectations by bringing in your son or daughter’s most mediocre contemporary.
4. Double Check Your Clocks Day
An important day for all Americans is this day in late July in which everyone makes sure all the clocks in their home are still working and keeping the right time. Cell phone, wristwatches, oven timers, microwaves, alarm clocks, all the clocks that keep everyone on time deserve to be checked and maintained from time to time. This is that time.
5. Completely Benign And Concealable Skin Cancer Awareness Day
Concerned Americans show their support every April 3 by drawing a tiny red dot (using a non-permanent marker) on a concealable part of their skin.
6. National Crepe And Laundry Detergent Day
This holiday on the second Monday of August was created as a wedding present when the heir to a major laundry detergent fortune wed the scion of a major crepe family. Though the couple could not bridge the gap between their worlds and ultimately split up, the holiday lives on.
7. National Ja Rule’s Career Memorial Day
Done in solemn remembrance of the rapper/singer’s career, Americans everywhere gather to pay respects to a once thriving, vibrant hip-hop career every December 2.
8. National Eat Your Pillow Right After You Wake Up Day
Children from coast to coast can’t wait to wake up every year on February 24, pull out their traditional pillow-splicing utensils, chow down until the last feather is gone, and receive the customary reward for eating it all from their parents: a fluffy new pillow!
9. Cup Of Coffee Flying Toward Your Face Awareness Day
Every March 15, many people gather to throw large cups filled with piping hot coffee at their coworkers as a reminder of the dangerous cups flying towards their face at that very moment.