CONTENT WARNING: ARTICLE DISCUSSES FAILURES OF AUSTIN BUTLER, POOR MANNERS, AND HENTAI.
Austin Butler fans may want to sit down for this one, because the following is not going to be easy to hear: Austin Butler has failed his cotillion class.
Noooo! This is just so, so sad.
Although The Mary Richards School of Etiquette in Atlanta, GA teaches cotillion classes for kids aged 11-13, 34-year-old Austin Butler recently enrolled in the six-week course, apparently looking to refine his manners and dancing skills. Though the actor is known for going method, his reps confirm this was not related to a role in any way whatsoever, making it all the more tragic that, according to teacher Mary Richards, Austin is the only student she’s ever had to fail.
As stated on the Certificate of Failure that Austin received at the end of the course, the Elvis actor was completely unable to master basic tenets of poise, etiquette, and social norms. Although teacher Mary Richards explained that it’s not even the type of class you can fail, citing that “it’s really just something you pay for and then complete,” she was left with no choice but to withhold Austin’s Certificate of Completion based on his poor performance. Austin’s failures included: “an inability to use proper silverware (he insisted on eating with two knives, like chopsticks, when a simple fork would do), a refusal to say please and thank you (during the lesson on writing thank you cards he declined to do anything but draw Tweety Bird hentai), and a failure to even learn to button up a shirt (he just couldn’t do it).”
Yiiiiiikes. This is not a good look for Austin!
Sources say that Austin took the news pretty hard. While the rest of his classmates celebrated the completion of their cotillion class with a ball where they showed off their foxtrots to parents and chaperones, Butler reportedly spent the evening watching from the window, crying softly and sadly drawing some hentai, which teacher Mary Richards believes was Austin’s way of writing an apology card.
Just heartbreaking.
Honestly, it’s quite upsetting that Austin Butler couldn’t figure this one out. But Austin, if you’re out there reading this, know that we believe in you. Dig deep, work hard, and trust in yourself. With faith in God, anything is possible, even passing your cotillion class!
