Well, it seems as though it’s the end of the road for one beloved British actor from the famed Harry Potter movies, and we’ve got to say, he’s had a good run: Rupert Grint just announced that he has eaten pussy twice and is ready to receive lethal injection!
Farewell, Rupert! It sounds like you’ve accomplished what you set out to do in life, and you’re ready to end your time on this Earth!
According to a post Grint made on social media this morning, the 31-year-old actor has, as of yesterday, performed cunnilingus a total of two times. Grint explained that, having fulfilled what he considers to be his mission on Earth, he now plans to be put to death by the state via a euthanization procedure.
“Friends, family, and fans: I’ve come to a crossroads in my life and career, and it’s time for me to make a major change,” Grint explained in a text post on Instagram. “For as long as I can remember, I have had two items on my bucket list: eat pussy, and eat pussy again. I crossed off the first about ten years ago, and as of yesterday have completed the second. I have been lucky enough to enjoy a wonderful acting career and a joyful family and social life during my time here on Earth, but now that I have accomplished my two major life goals, I feel strongly that it is time for me to be executed at my local jail via a lethal dose of barbiturates.”
“After I am put to death, I will float up to heaven, where God will tell me I did a great job at both eating pussy and being Ron,” Grint went on.
Wow. From getting cast in the Harry Potter series at the tender age of 11 to appearing in the London theatre scene and starring in the Apple TV series Servant, Rupert Grint has had a life and career most would envy. It’s a shame it can’t go on any longer, but there’s no denying that it was great while it lasted.
“Being that I am a gentleman, I will not reveal the names of the women who I have pleasured orally, but I feel comfortable revealing that both of them said, ‘All right, that’s enough. Please go away now,’ when I was done. I hope that knowledge will bring some comfort to my loyal fan base when I am gone,” Grint continued. “In conclusion, I’d like to thank you all for following my career all these years. I will look down on you from Paradise for the rest of eternity, and I will never forget my incredible time here on Earth. So, goodbye for now, and as always…gooooo, Rupert Grint!”
Wow. It’s heartbreaking to hear about Rupert Grint’s life coming to a close, but in the end, we can all appreciate that what he did here on Earth was pretty incredible. We’re glad that Rupert was able to have all the life experiences he was looking for in this world, including two attempts at cunnilingus, and we wish him all the best in the afterlife. Good luck up there in heaven, Rupert!
