This is simply heartbreaking. The internet’s anti-aging maverick has been forced to end his bid for eternal youth: Bryan Johnson instantly aged 200 years after someone spilled soda on him.
Years of progress, wiped away by a splash of soda…what a tragic way for Bryan’s longevity experiment to conclude
On Instagram, Bryan revealed that a lab technician got Fanta on him during a routine body fat scan. The technician was drinking orange soda over him when the two-liter bottle slipped from her grip, splashing onto Bryan’s chest. Though only four to five ounces spilled onto Bryan, the sugary soft drink’s aging-effects were visible in a matter of seconds, as Bryan’s skin dried up, his body hair turned gray, and his eyes went foggy white. After techs wiped the soda off, analysis of Bryan’s vital organs, blood, and penis showed that the 47-year-old was no longer biologically 18, but rather 250 years old.
“Someone got Fanta on me. I now have the skin, heart, and brain of a 250-year-old man. I am devastated,” Bryan wrote on a text-only Instagram post. “Fanta has set back my anti-aging research beyond hope of recovery. All the blood from younger men in the world couldn’t help me regain the progress I’ve lost to the soda. My longevity journey is over. I’m going to take some time away from social media to process being 250 years old instead of the little boy I dedicated my life to looking like. Please respect my privacy. Thank you.”
Ugh. To see this happen someone so passionate about their work is just terrible.
Our thoughts are with Bryan as he navigates life having unexpectedly aged several lifetimes due to someone spilling soda on him. Thank you for all you’ve done for anti-aging research either way, Bryan. Your contributions will never be forgotten!
