Whether you’re a metal fan or just someone who’d like a cool way to be memorialized after you’re nothing more than a shredded mass of guts and flesh, you’re going to want to see this: The DMV has announced that driver licenses will now have a box to check to consent to an image of your mangled corpse being used on a death metal album cover in the event you die in a car accident.
Hell yeah! There’s no higher honor for a metal lover than to have half of your still-smiling head appear alongside the indecipherable logo of a band that sings about necrophilia and cannibalism.
Next to the organ donor box, all licenses will now have an additional box you can check that reads, “In the event of an accident, I consent to my awesome-looking, gory corpse being used on album covers, posters, and t-shirts for the heaviest, sickest bands around*. *No poser shit.”
“We love using the most repulsive, disturbing photos imaginable on our album covers to give listeners an idea of the harrowing, corpse-reeking death metal they are about to hear,” explained Pissgrave vocalist and guitarist Demian Fenton. “But we’ve always been concerned about using real gore photos without the consent of the rotting, burned, torn-up corpses on our covers. With the DMV’s new policy, we can finally source artwork that’s not only vomit-inducing and completely putrid, but also ethical.”
Even cooler, drivers who check both the organ donor and metal album art consent forms may even have their body parts used as stage props for metal bands’ photoshoots or live shows. So if you’ve always dreamed of having your lungs hanging from a mic stand while Devourment plays a ripping set, all you have to do is check a box on your license and hope you get t-boned by a cement truck sometime soon!
Hell yeah! What a cool way for the DMV to let drivers support the arts in death!
