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Connecting With The Heartland: The DNC Has Paid A Manhattan Consulting Firm $20 Million To Show It A Picture Of A Guy On A Tractor

With the 2018 midterm elections fast approaching, the Democratic Party is making efforts to fix its past mistakes and better understand rural voters. As such, the Democratic National Committee has started sinking some serious cash into researching the American heartland: According to reports, the DNC just paid a Manhattan consulting firm $20 million to show it a picture of a guy on a tractor.

Smart move. Looking at that photo could be the key to regaining the voters that Hillary failed to pick up!

Drawing from the DNC’s war chest of campaign contributions, party chair Tom Perez reportedly paid Ellis & Porter Communications, a Madison Avenue media strategy firm, $20 million last week to type the words “man riding tractor” into Google and show the organization what it found. Just 24 hours later, sources say that Nancy Pelosi and other Democratic Party leaders were seen entering the building, where the firm then found a suitable picture, dragged the file to its desktop, and then proceeded to name it “farmer.jpeg.”

Once the picture of the man riding a tractor was secured and printed, the firm’s CEO reportedly called a private meeting with DNC members and held the photo up, at which point Pelosi clapped her hands excitedly, gave two thumbs-up, and started whooping with delight. Then, after investing an additional $10 million there on the spot, the photo was reportedly mailed to the U.S. Capitol building in Washington, D.C., where it was promptly shown to Chuck Schumer and Kirsten Gillibrand, who declared the Democratic comeback in 2018 basically a done deal.

Wow, it looks like a blue revolution is poised to sweep the House and Senate!

Now that the DNC has seen the photo of some guy on a tractor, it seems inevitable that its members are going to not just lock down the legislative branches, but also lock down the White House in 2020. So, thank you, Tom Perez and the DNC! It looks like this was $20 million well spent.