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First Steps: Donald Trump Has To Go Around The White House’s Neighborhood Letting Residents Know He Is Moving In Down The Street

Donald Trump’s inauguration may be months from now, but it looks like his Oval Office transition is already well under way. In addition to naming Reince Priebus his chief of staff and meeting with advisors on policy issues, Trump had to schedule in some time this week to go around to houses in the White House’s neighborhood and inform residents that he’s moving in down the street.

Looks like Trump is not wasting any time preparing for his big move to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

“Hello, my name is Donald Trump, and as a new resident in this community, I am required to inform you that I have a history of sexually assaulting women,” said the president-elect while standing on one of his new neighbor’s doorsteps. “In the past, I have grabbed women inappropriately, made multiple unwanted advances toward women, and harassed women with vulgar and inflammatory language. For this reason, I have to go door to door telling residents of my new presence in the neighborhood. Sorry to bother you, and have a nice day.”

After spending most of Tuesday exploring potential cabinet picks, Trump was later spotted going around the White House’s neighborhood and knocking on doors, continuing to alert his new neighbors to his history of sexual assault. Standing awkwardly on front porches and avoiding eye contact, Trump promised local residents that he wouldn’t cause any trouble for them or their families and planned to mostly keep to himself for the next four years as president of the United States. He then finished the day by meeting with several economic advisors.

It’ll be interesting to see what a Trump presidency might look like as he spends the next few days crafting policy goals and reassuring his new neighbors that his motorcade will take alternate routes to ensure that he is never within a hundred yards of a school. If he keeps making the rounds at this pace, it won’t be long before all of the residents of Pennsylvania Avenue have been made aware of his record of sexual assault.

President Obama still has a few more months left in the White House, but pretty soon Trump will be moving in. So far, the president-elect seems determined to make that transition as smooth as possible for him, his fellow Republicans, and the local residents whom he has been individually informing of his status as a sexual predator.