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It’s Summer And If You’re Not Hopelessly In Love, You Might As Well Be Dead

Do you feel that? It’s that time of year. The whole world feels just positively kissed with sunlight. Birds are singing, grass feels warm under bare feet—honestly, if you’re not already head over heels in love with someone right now, you may as well be a corpse.

Summer is a time when magical things can happen. One minute, you’re rolling around with your sweetheart on a gingham picnic blanket, and the next, running with that same picnic blanket over your heads during a sudden thunderstorm, laughing and stumbling into each other’s arms. Without someone to share it with, what’s the difference between you and a tightly sealed jar of pulverized ash and bone?

Everyone should feel this way during summer. Everyone should wake up every morning excited for a new adventure with their true love and best friend. And if you’re alone, what’s the point of being alive at all? Summertime is made for lovers, and if you’re not a lover, you should probably be rotting six feet under the ground.

Without someone to share it with, what’s the difference between you and a tightly sealed jar of pulverized ash and bone?

Imagine lying on your back and watching fireworks by yourself. Or catching a firefly with no one to show it to. Wouldn’t you much rather just cease to exist in one quick, brutal instant?

Summer is when life slows down and you realize what’s really important—the person at your side who helps define you, as you help define them, twin halves of the same soul, basking in the honeyed light of long days that seem to stretch on forever. Unless you’re single, in which case a writhing coating of maggots might as well be liquidating you.

For lovers, nothing quite beats summer. Except maybe watching the leaves change color in the fall. Or huddling together in front of a fireplace on Christmas Eve. And don’t even get me started on springtime. Those are also just for lovers.