Need To Cry At Work But Don’t Want Your Male Coworkers To Lose Respect For You? Here Are 5 Photos Of Damaged Boats To Pretend That You’re Sad About
July 31, 2017
Don’t let the men in your office label you a “hysterical woman.” So long as they think your tears are for these five damaged boats, your reputation at work will be totally fine.
1. Look, we’ve all been there. If you need to cry at the office but you don’t want to seem unprofessional, just pull up this picture of a decimated boat and let it all out. When your male coworkers see you sobbing at your desk over the splintered ruins of this once-majestic sailing vessel, they’ll not only understand, but they’ll respect you instantly.
2. Assuming you can’t make it to a bathroom stall or empty hallway in time, immediately zoom in on this photo of a damaged lobster boat and have it take up as much of your screen as possible. When your coworkers pass by and see you sobbing over thousands of pounds of damaged cargo, they won’t roll their eyes at you—they’ll admire you. Who knows, they might even offer you a tissue, or send you a nice email with their condolences!
3. If all you need is to get a light sniffle off your chest, staring at this ancient canoe, which is over 100 years old and totally unmaintained, will definitely do the trick! But beware: If your coworkers can’t see it, make sure to audibly lament the damage by crying phrases like “Who would do this to a canoe?,” etc. You don’t want anyone thinking those “overly emotional” tears aren’t maritime-related!
4. Okay, now it’s time for the big guns. Before you have a full-on mental breakdown at your desk in your open-plan office, know that pulling up this photo of a sinking cruise ship is going to be the only way to save face. When your boss sees you absolutely losing it to this $90 million cruise ship sinking into the sea, there’s no way he won’t rush to your defense. “Take the rest of the day to cool off,” he’ll say. “We’ve all been there,” he’ll say. But you know what he won’t say? “Pull yourself together.” Because you’re crying over this boat, not because you’re an emotional woman!
5. Bottom line: There’s no way your male coworkers can judge you if you show them this damaged boat photo and they start crying along with you! When they come over to comfort you, just point them toward your screen, and soon, one by one, they’ll start to choke on their own tears. Then, once they trudge back to their desks, depressed from this photo, you can sob all day if you want. Honestly, it’s a win for everyone!
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