Long ago, a prophecy foretold the coming of a singular hero who would one day wield great power in the vast realm of the Internet, and, lo and behold, it appears that this Chosen One may now be in our midst: This man just identified all four of the trucks shrouded within this CAPTCHA, proving himself worthy of passage onto the web.
My God, it must be him! The one destined by the Seers of yore!
Devin Mark of Tampa, Florida awoke this morning with no foreknowledge of the grand journey on which he was about to embark, but as soon as he attempted to log into his Home Depot account to browse for a new curtain rod, he encountered a daunting challenge: a seemingly impenetrable digital barrier that would yield to no man except he who could solve a strange, cryptic puzzle asking one to correctly identify all iconography representing the concept of “truck” from a dizzying grid of imagery. While most internet users would simply back down in the face of such a formidable task, Devin fearlessly moved forth in pursuit of the destiny written centuries before he was born, first finding the back half of a semi truck in the top right square of the puzzle, then a Ford F-150 in the middle square.
But then, after successfully locating the first two trucks, Devin became momentarily paralyzed with doubt, hovering his cursor over a far left square which contained what was clearly a hatchback sedan, not a truck—but lo, though he stumbled, he did not fall. Drawing upon the strength of the ancients, Devin cast the sedan image aside, his eyes drawn as if by divine providence to an image depicting three-quarters of the back side of an 18-wheeler. It was then that he was at last granted safe passage to the Home Depot website, fulfilling his sacred birthright as the great web traveler foretold so many ages ago.
We have waited for so long, and now he is here!
It may seem far-fetched that a simple 20-something from Florida could truly be the “blessed heir of the Covenant, under whose feet the Web shall be laid as foundation for His house, built from the spoils of Online Shopping,” as the ancient oracles ordained eight thousand years before his birth. But now that Devin has achieved clear passage onto the Home Depot website and is safely browsing for a white curtain rod that will fit over his bathroom window, we have no choice but to believe that he is indeed The One.
All praise to Devin, our divinely appointed web sentinel. You have been Chosen—now go forth!
