A woman’s divine sensuality is a beautiful thing to behold, and the scene unfolding in a bathroom in New York right now will have you in awe of one young goddess’s arresting femininity: This woman using her phone on the toilet just entered the promo code HORMONEHEALTH to buy a pack of flesh-toned underwear.
Breathtaking!
Twenty-six-year-old Amelia Cavalieri of Albany, New York may be a receptionist by trade, but in her essence she is more like the goddess Aphrodite, looking absolutely mesmerizing over the past 12 minutes while hunched atop her toilet with her eyes glued on her iPhone after she finished shitting but didn’t really feel like getting up yet. Amelia, being the glowing conduit of raw yonic energy that she is, had happened upon an ad for a three-pack of high-rise, full coverage underwear in the color “flesh,” and sensed that the garments had the potential to reveal her sensuality in all its fullness. She knew right away the underwear was her destiny, as she suddenly remembered, via the awesome power of feminine intuition, that she had recently heard a promo code for just such underpants on the menstrual cramps episode of a podcast called The Woman Solution. It was no coincidence—mysterious cosmic forces had brought her to these underpants and, trusting her instincts, she added the three-pack to her cart and entered the promo code HORMONEHEALTH when prompted, unlocking the 15 percent in savings on the boyshort panties whose antimicrobial technology promised to ameliorate any “unwanted scents,” just as the universe had ordained for her.
Like an orchid in full bloom, Amelia’s feminine vitality is truly mesmerizing.
As she pressed “order” and signed up for the direct-to-consumer underwear brand’s mailing list, Amelia felt herself fantasizing about what would happen next: the beige panties arriving in tantalizing recyclable cellulose packaging, which she would rip open in a display of total carnal abandon before trying on the underwear beneath her favorite pair of stretch pants, inspecting her own ass by standing on the edge of her bathtub in front of her bathroom mirror. Even with her severe PMS bloating, it’d be a breathtaking sight to behold—pure feminine beauty in its most potent form.
It really doesn’t get any more sensual than this. Let’s hope that Amelia chose the expedited shipping on her new pack of undies, because the glorious womanly energy pent up inside her needs to be released!
