There’s putting the cart before the horse, and then there’s being flat out oblivious. This is a prime example of the latter: This 3 year-old who still needs help wiping his own ass just asked what happens to pets when they die.
Yeah, listen, kid: What matters right now is you learning how to go to the bathroom by yourself like a normal person. Whether dogs have souls is a question that can absolutely wait.
Earlier today, three-year-old Joshua Jacobson tried punching way above his intellectual weight class when he asked his parents “if doggies and kitties go to Heaven,” not five minutes after desperately screaming out for his mother to come help him on the potty. To be clear, the question of whether a living being’s consciousness continues to exist in some form after death is an undoubtedly engaging point of discussion, but not so much when it’s coming from a person who literally swallowed a bunch of change for absolutely no reason last week. As fascinating as it is to consider religious perspectives that may include or exclude animals in their conceptions of the afterlife—or, from an atheistic perspective, what happens to say, a dog’s corpse, as it physically decomposes—Joshua needs to concern himself with figuring out how to wipe his own butt, clean the globs of snot off his own chin, and refrain from sobbing every time his dad runs the vacuum cleaner before he can take on any of the deeper philosophical questions about the nature of life as we know it.
If you’re still reluctant to use the toilet because you’re afraid you might fall into it, how about you pipe down with the existential queries, ‘kay?
God, it must be so irritating to raise a child who somehow doesn’t understand how to use toilet paper, yet feels the need to start obnoxious conversations pretentious bullshit like this. Joshua seriously needs to stop asking unanswerable questions about life and death, and start learning how to clean the shit out of his ass, and quick.
