While Republicans enjoy the result of a “red wave” presidential election in which much of the country took a rightward turn and Donald Trump won both the electoral college and the popular vote, left-wing politicians are already hard at work preventing what could be a nightmare scenario during Trump’s second term: Democrats just Trump-proofed the nation by passing legislation ensuring syrup can never be named ‘Aunt Jemima’ again.
Thank God! At least our country is now fully safeguarded against the potential effects of Trump’s worst impulses.
Immediately after the election was called for Trump, Democrats in Congress held an emergency legislative session and worked with President Biden to pass what they are calling “the most important legislation of our generation.” The law, called the Non-Jemima Syrup Act of 2024, completely neuters Trump and his GOP Congress of the ability to change the name of any syrup or pancake mix to “Aunt Jemima” at any point or for any reason (including during wartime). The move will no doubt have millions of Democrats breathing a sign of relief as they brace for the inauguration of a president who has made it no secret that he does not like syrups that go woke.
“A second Trump presidency will stress the guardrails of democracy like never before,” said Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer. “With this legislation, we have prevented the worst possible outcome. Donald Trump has made it clear that he is an authoritarian who will stop at nothing to change the name of syrup back to ‘Aunt Jemima,’ and as patriots, we refuse to stand idly by and watch him destroy our country like that.”
Hell yeah! It’s amazing to see our elected officials standing up to Trump.
Whether Democrats can find the votes to prevent rice from being named “Uncle Ben’s” ever again remains to be seen, but with this legislation passed, liberals anxious about what harm Trump can do to our country can rest a lot easier. Democracy FTW!
