Over the past several years, many Instagram influencers have started using the platform to sell courses and resources on topics ranging from personal finance to parenting to nutrition. But one user is taking a befuddling tack that no one seems quite able to figure out: This normal-ass woman is using Instagram to sell something called her “blueprint” with no indication as to what it’s a blueprint for.
Huh. What could this lady possibly be trying to sell us right now?
Amber Woodburn of Manassas, Virginia is just a regular 32-year-old woman with a job in payroll at a healthcare company, but for some reason, she has started posting diligently on Instagram to advertise her “blueprint,” which she claims is a “life-changing plan for moving forward,” and which costs $79.99 to purchase in PDF form. In one of Amber’s recent reels, upbeat music plays over video clips of Amber adding mulch to her garden, Amber purchasing a box of spaghetti and a can of corn at the grocery store, and Amber speaking to an attendant at a car dealership. Text over the video reads, “Are you sick of it? Do you need to make the big switch? Comment ‘blueprint’ below to receive a link.”
We really aren’t sure what’s going on here. It’s possible her blueprint is about mulch? Or…getting more food? And cars?
This week, Amber advertised a 40% off sale on her blueprint for “eager students,” which would also include enrollment in her “Make It Happen” seminar, which is a three-hour video series on “how it’s done, when to do it, and finding your all-important ‘why.'” These advertisements have been accompanied by images of Amber at a laptop, Amber in a dentist’s chair, and even Amber helping her cat give birth to kittens, none of which have at all helped in revealing the mystery of what exactly Amber wants to teach us. Usually a blueprint is a detailed plan, so it would help a lot to know what exactly Amber’s patented plan is for. If it’s a blueprint for living life like Amber, it seems based on her page like that would pretty much just entail posting regular-ass selfies and occasionally reading a bestselling novel—so we have to hope that she’s got something more to offer us, though we can’t imagine what that would involve.
Well, it doesn’t seem like we are anywhere close to finding out what Amber’s blueprint is, as fascinated as we may be. In the end, we might have to shell out the $79.99 just so we can learn what the hell she’s been going on about all this time.
