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True Hero: This Lawyer Will Work Pro Bono For Anyone Suing The Snow Globe Industry

If you’re looking for a story to brighten your day, then look no further.

He may not own a cape or have x-ray vision, but Jack Wilson of Pittsburgh, PA is nothing short of a hero. Despite working grueling long weeks at his law firm Wilson, Meadows & Bay, he still finds time to do something truly exemplary: This bighearted lawyer will work completely pro bono for anyone suing the snow globe industry.

Incredible. What a selfless human being.

“I won’t stand idly by while hardworking, everyday Americans suffer,” said Wilson, who refuses to take a dime from anyone who’s ever had their life ruined by snow globes. “I don’t care about the money; I don’t even care if your case concerns a Christmas-themed snow globe or one that has a little coral reef and fish that you shake around. If you’ve been wronged by these wintry trinkets in any way, then I will fight for you.”

Wow, now that’s doing what’s right! Jack strongly believes that justice is more important than greed, and will see to it that these monolithic snow globe corporations pay you what you deserve. Thanks to Jack’s generosity, it doesn’t require taking out a mortgage on your house to find representation against Big Snow Globe—all it takes is one phone call to this real-life guardian angel.

“There are so many people out there who have had their lives ruined by snow globe manufacturers and don’t have the means to fight back,” said Wilson, who has been named Person of the Year five different times by Snow Globe Victim Magazine. “From your standard winter landscape snow globe to a cheeky Phoenix souvenir snow globe where you shake glitter around a cactus, if a glass sphere filled with water and small moveable parts you shake around has negatively impacted your life, I will lay down an unholy hammer of pain on these snow globe companies. These bastards need to know they aren’t above the law.”

While Jack’s heroism will probably never be adapted into a Marvel movie, his work is as admirable as all of the Avengers put together. We applaud you, Jack, for standing up for the little guy and putting the snow globe industry on notice!