Well, you can officially say goodbye to your plans to have a quiet night to yourself, because yet again, for some inexplicable reason, the love of your life would like to go out and do something tonight.
Unbelievable. It’s all the time with this shit, really.
Just as you sat down and turned on the TV after getting home today, your one true love decided it was a perfect evening to go into town and do something fun as a couple, as if you didn’t already hang out one night last week, and another night the week before that. Your kindred spirit apparently harbors a persistent and annoying desire to share intermittent experiences with you despite having already hung out with you LITERALLY DOZENS OF TIMES over the years, because simply going to a place that isn’t your house makes their heart light up or some nonsense like that, which is why they feel the maddening need to do it over and over again. It’s seriously beyond ridiculous. Been there, done that, ad infinitum.
Just cut it out with all this “spend quality time together” bullshit already!
Like, first you had to meet your partner. Then you had to get to know them. Then you had to go through all the rigamarole of developing a loving, supportive relationship. And yet now, even though you’ve already gone through so many hoops to build a fulfilling, meaningful life with your soulmate or whatever, you’re still expected to keep doing additional shit on a—no exaggeration—weekly basis. It’s like, you’ve already fallen in love and committed your lives to each other and everything, so why keep beating a dead horse?
These occasional mutual activities are simply too much!
If this is what growing old with the person you love most is going to look like—getting dragged off the couch multiple times a month to spend time together in an endless Groundhog Day-like cycle—you may have to reconsider this whole arrangement, because it just doesn’t seem sustainable. Can’t your partner just leave you alone so you can love them in peace? All this ridiculous “quality time” and “affection” stuff is getting old.
