If you’ve got a teenage boy at home, listen up, because there’s an astronomical event happening soon that’s going to have your son going wild: NASA has announced that this Friday is the MILF moon.
Looks like it’s time to dust off the old telescope, set it up by the window in your son’s room, and leave them be!
Earlier today, NASA announced that the rare MILF moon will be appearing in the night sky this Friday, an extraordinary lunar stage that only happens once every 52 years. The agency projects that visibility of the MILF moon will be clearest in areas with high concentrations of adolescent horniness, such as the jacuzzis at Great Wolf Lodge resorts and pretty much anywhere in Daytona Beach.
“Beginning early Friday evening, a vague scent of cigarette smoke, spilled beer, and Victoria’s Secret Love Spell will waft through the air, followed by the gentle clacking sound of long fake nails, alerting teenage boys to the fact that the MILF moon is about to rise,” said NASA in a press release. “Throughout the duration of this lunar event, we can expect teenage boys to be giddily high-fiving each other for hours on end as they gawk at the MILF moon and exchange off-color comments about wanting to ‘tap that.’”
“We highly recommend that parents do not walk in on their sons at any point during the night and interrupt their viewing of the MILF moon, because it would surely be awkward for both of you,” the agency added. “The next time this moon happens again, your boys will be well into their 60s and far less hormonal, so it’s best that you just let them savor this one now.”
Fascinating!
It sounds like this has the potential to be one of the horniest lunar events of the century, so if you’re a 16-year-old in the throes of puberty, get ready to go crazy with lust. Eyes to the sky, boys! This is going to be the hottest moon ever.
