A stunning new mathematical result has just been announced that experts say will revolutionize the field forever: Mathematicians have discovered the number eight hovering in the desert and making a humming noise.
Mind. Blown. This is a truly major breakthrough.
The discovery occurred when mathematicians from M.I.T. were on a field expedition in the Nafud Desert in central Saudi Arabia. There, they discovered the number eight floating about three feet above the desert sand making a noise that one mathematician described as “a hum so quiet you could barely hear it, yet listening to it drowned out all your thoughts.” After using their graphing calculators, the researchers confirmed that this was, indeed, the number eight, which caused immediate celebration among mathematicians all over the world.
“A lot of us thought that we’d never find eight in the desert making a noise like a whispering demon, but now that it has I’m just so happy and amazed,” said Terence Tao, a professor of mathematics at UCLA who is widely considered to be one of the greatest mathematicians in the world. “A discovery like this opens up so many new avenues for study, such as what does eight taste like and does eight scream if we throw bricks at it? I can’t wait to find out.”
The discovery of the number eight floating in the desert has already led to several new and significant discoveries that build upon the researchers’ original results. A joint team of mathematicians from Harvard and the University of Cambridge recently published a paper confirming that the number eight casts the shadow of the number 12 across the desert sands as it hovers. As if that wasn’t amazing enough, Grigory Perelman, the reclusive Russian mathematician famous for proving the elusive Poincaré conjecture, recently went to the desert and shot the number eight with a crossbow—a breakthrough that many experts predict will win him the prestigious Abel Prize, sometimes called the “Nobel Prize of math.”
This is seriously so cool. There really seems to be no limit to the new discoveries that can be made after this incredible advancement. It’s amazing to know for sure where the number eight is hovering and what it sounds like. Kudos to the mathematical community on this groundbreaking new find!
