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Sex Is A Sacred Act Between A Man And My Wife

By thinking of sex as a casual encounter that’s used primarily for the pursuit of pleasure, our culture has lost sight of sex as God intended it to be. The Lord gave us sex so we could create life and bond on a spiritual level, which is why it’s essential that we ignore so-called progressive values and preserve sex as a sacred act between a man and my wife.

Sex is a gift that God designed for people who are married, such as my wife, who partakes in this gift bountifully by becoming one flesh with many of God’s children of all different races and creeds. By preserving the sanctity of sex, my wife is able to praise God through this intimate act loudly and fiercely, most days of the week while I’m off at work, running errands, or just out in the yard waiting for her to finish up and let me back in the house.

People desecrate and devalue sex by rushing into it with someone they just started dating, or even having it with a random person off the street, but it’s so much more meaningful to wait to sleep with a woman until after she is married to me. Yes, you may have really wanted to have pre-marital sex with my wife, but now that she’s a married woman, feel free to call up her up anytime. My bet is that you’ll be glad you waited until she had a ring I paid for on her finger—I know I was, and I know I’ll never forget the four joyous times we consecrated our marriage in our 15 years together.

Sex is not meant to be a cheap pleasure but rather a profound act of lovemaking. More than just a physical act, it should be the union of a man’s soul with my wife’s soul, intimately forged at  whatever hotel or Airbnb my wife booked with my credit card, or maybe even in the master bedroom of my house, which is where I used to sleep before being relegated to the sofa (which is fine, it’s a pull-out!) to make room for the all-night-long fornication sessions that my wife regularly partakes in with neighbors, old college acquaintances, or even unvetted strangers from the internet.

The Lord gave us sex so that we could procreate in His name, so when a man does sleep with my wife, he should not use protection, which would break the natural origins of the act. In fact, there is no greater way to give thanks to the Lord than by co-creating life alongside Him, which my wife has proudly done numerous times with numerous fathers, none of whom are me, but maybe someday, should my wife take back her claim that I’m “uninteresting, sexually.” 

Ultimately, if sex was not meant to happen only between a man and my wife, then God would have not designed her genitals to so snugly accommodate such a vast array of erect members, wrapping glove-like around each and every one regardless of girth or proportion. And with today’s hookup culture so prevalent, I know that men may feel certain societal pressures to have sex with someone who isn’t my wife, but let me assure them, my wife is at home right now, waiting to make beautiful love to you. Come over anytime—I’ll have dinner ready for the two of you when you’re done.