America is in a deep existential crisis, fueled by a hostile political culture, economic uncertainty, and a plummeting sense of common ground among its people. In fact, the only thing US citizens seem to agree on anymore isn’t cause for hope at all: New polls show that 100% of Americans have forgotten why we built a society in the first place and why we need to keep doing it.
Yikes. If you’re a country, this is pretty much the last kind of consensus you want uniting your populace!
According to a Pew Research study released this week, not a single U.S. citizen was able to recall how they got roped into American society to begin with, why they’ve continued being a part of it, or why so much time, energy, and resources are devoted to its continuation day in and day out. Those polled unanimously felt that maintaining our country’s functional existence has become more of an “ongoing chore” than “a way of life,” and that the institutions which supposedly make it worth our daily participation, like hospitals, schools, and public infrastructure, barely even work, and further, that the pop culture and entertainment meant to distract us from how bad things are getting is “pure dogshit now, too.” The poll respondents were also unanimous in feeling that if our commonwealth is working well for any group of people, those people are almost certainly the exact pieces of shit responsible for how badly things are going for everyone else.
The only practical reason any of Pew’s interviewees could remember as to why they’ve kept participating in American society every day of their life was to avoid being punished by American society itself, in the form of cyclical poverty, imprisonment, and social marginalization. Just about all respondents went so far as to express that any reasonable person who stopped and thought about it for one second would conclude it is “bizarre,” “masochistic,” and “deeply immoral” for all of us to wake up each and every day and enable this thing to continue. When asked what alternatives would be preferable to American society, those polled were in total accord, answering “anything but this” was preferable to “whatever this is,” whether it be returning to a nomadic hunting-gathering society, creating an anarchic wildland full of roving bands of pirates and bandits, or simply copying the societal blueprint of a less schizoid, hateful, entitled, wasteful civilization and rolling with that.
The poll’s results showed across-the-board frustration with whoever thought that forcing millions of people from separate countries with completely different cultures to live together forever was a good idea, and not utterly, recklessly psychotic. No participants claimed to be surprised that their society is not working as intended, as it’s grown clear there was never a real game plan in place for American civilization, just a list of rules that some people get put on the street or locked in a cage for breaking, while other people don’t have to follow those same rules for reasons that are usually made up. And all participants expressed bewilderment over the fact that it’s managed to last this long without imploding, or without some other country stepping in to put us out of our collective misery and sparing the rest of the world from the fallout of our continued existence.
Regardless of political identity or socioeconomic background, those polled were also in full concurrence that putting our society on pause even just for a couple days’ breather, but preferably until further notice, could be in everyone’s best interests, given the country’s whole situation is getting worse by the day with no end in sight. When asked, “How would you feel if you woke up tomorrow and found out that American society disappeared overnight?”, those polled universally answered “Mostly relieved.”
Well damn. These poll results are far from encouraging!
If someone remembers how hundreds of millions of us wound up using every facet of our short time on this planet in the service of an unforgiving, unfeeling system of life, please let us know in the comments ASAP!
