When presented with an incredible opportunity, it can be hard to keep your chill, and this story out of Richmond, VA is about a kid whose overexcitement about his current situation might blow the whole thing up: This 7-year-old kid’s mom let him sit in the front seat for the first time and he immediately reclined his seat way back and started messing with the AC.
Get a grip, dude! She’s not gonna let you back up here if you don’t cut this shit out!
Even though she always said he wouldn’t be allowed to sit up front until he reached double digits, by the grace of God, Max’s mom decided Max could sit up front today on their drive home from the dentist. However, Max is dangerously close to wrecking this enviable state of affairs, because as soon as his mom started driving, he pointed all of the vents at himself, jacked the AC up to high, and turned the seat heater up to 88 degree before reclining so far he was basically just laying down. Although Max did manage to quickly put his seat back up before he got yelled at, he is continuing to test the limits by pressing every button on the car’s front console and rolling the window all the way down despite the fact that the AC is clearly blasting.
Does this kid realize this is his one shot to prove he can handle sitting up front? Knock it off, Max!
Max could have used the long red light his mom just hit to relax and enjoy his first ever ride in the front of the Camry, but instead he decided to pass the time by pulling his seat belt as far as it would go before letting it snap back against his chest. While this was definitely fun, when he tried to pull the seat belt out again, he realized it had somehow locked over him, leaving him basically trapped until the end of the ride. However, any hope that this would constrain Max was immediately lost, as he proceeded to start playing with the sun visor above his head. He yanked it down, causing the menu for his favorite pizza place to fall out, which led him to chant “Pizza! Pizza! I want pizza!” even though he knows it’s a weekday and his parents only ever get takeout on Saturdays.
Dude, the only reason your mom let you up here is because you were “so mature during your teeth cleaning.” Is this really how someone who’s so mature during their teeth cleaning acts?!
Max’s mom had definitely just about had enough when Max started flipping through the XM radio stations with the volume all the way up, but he was able to buy himself some more time when he came across “SexyBack,” which is one of his mom’s favorite songs since it reminds her of the time in her life when she says she was fun. With his mom distracted by the music, Max proceeded to dig through the entire glove compartment and center console, both of which he’s perused thoroughly before while waiting for his mom to get back from filling a prescription at CVS.
Is that really worth it, Max? It’s the same stuff in there as always! Don’t fuck this up for yourself because you want to look at a bunch of loose pens!!!
From there, Max pulled out the car’s registration and started leafing through it, causing his mom to finally snap and threaten to make him sit in the backseat. While there’s no guarantee this means she’s never gonna let him sit up front again, it’s definitely not a good sign.
Just sit in your seat with your hands crossed, Max, because you are walking on thin ice right now! Don’t think Mom won’t pull the car over and make you sit in the back—remember when she really did stop on the side of the road after you kept kicking the back of her seat on the way to the Outer Banks? You’re almost home, so just be normal for three more minutes, and you might get to sit up front again.
