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Incredible Method Acting: Chris Pratt Paid A Gigantic Turtle To Kidnap His Wife In Order To Prepare For The Role Of Mario

When Nintendo fans learned that Chris Pratt had been cast in the role of Mario in the upcoming Super Mario Bros. movie, it definitely caused some concern among gamers who worried that the action star wouldn’t be able to portray the character in an honest and accurate way. Fortunately, Nintendo fans everywhere can breathe a sigh of relief, because it looks like Pratt is doing everything he can to prepare for the role and truly understand what it feels like to be Mario: Chris Pratt just revealed that he paid a gigantic turtle to kidnap his wife in order to prepare for the role of Mario!

So much yes! It’s awesome to know that Chris Pratt is really committed to making his performance as Mario as accurate as possible!

“I know how important it is to Nintendo fans everywhere that my portrayal of Mario is completely authentic, so to fully understand Mario’s emotional life, I hired a turtle the size of a minivan to break into my house, steal my wife, and take her back to his apartment so that I could experience the pain that Mario feels every time that Bowser kidnaps Princess Peach,” Pratt wrote in a recent Instagram post. “As I watched that massive, scaly beast drag my wife into the desert, I was consumed by a despair so all-consuming that I felt like I wanted to die. I immediately understood that this existential devastation, this constant desire for death, is what Mario feels every second of every day, and I feel that my performance in this movie communicates Mario’s nihilistic thirst for oblivion in an honest and vulnerable way.”

Wow! This is absolutely amazing method acting from Pratt. Daniel Day-Lewis himself couldn’t have prepared more thoroughly for the role of Mario!

The gigantic turtle, whose name is Honest Jafar, is 40,000 years old and was born knowing one secret about every human being who has ever lived or will ever be born. Pratt found the 12-ton creature on Craig’s list by posting, “Need tortoise to steal wife. Tortoise can be turtle. Must have shell. Please understand that I’m Pratt.” Later that day, Honest Jafar came stampeding through the wall of Pratt’s home and abducted his wife Catherine Schwarzenegger. Pratt says that he tried to fight off the gigantic turtle “the way Mario would” by “trying to set him on fire” and “eating a mushroom that made me grow three inches taller,” but in the end, Honest Jafar overpowered him. In his Instagram post, Pratt recalls “screaming and weeping like Mario” as he watched the enormous reptile carry his wife away.

This is absolutely awesome! If you’re not standing up and cheering in front of your computer right now, then you don’t deserve to call yourself a gamer. Pratt says that following the kidnapping, he tried to rescue his wife, but when he Googled “where is the lizard who took her?” to find out where Honest Jafar’s apartment was, he didn’t get any useful results. He does not expect to see his wife again, but as he tells his fans, “sometimes to become Mario, you need to lose everything.” It’s truly admirable that Pratt is willing to make these kinds of sacrifices for his art!

Yep, it’s official: Chris Pratt is putting in the work to explore the depths of Mario’s psyche and fully embody this legendary character. We were a little skeptical at first of the decision to cast him as the beloved plumber, but it’s clear that Pratt fully became Mario during this movie, and truly knows the character inside and out. We can’t wait to see Pratt bring Mario to life on the big screen!